Fact: Many financial advisors talk too much.
We study discovery meetings, and that’s one thing we’ve learned.
We have surveyed more than 1,000 advisors, asking them to assess how much they talk during discovery meetings. Eighty-seven percent believed they spoke less than half of the time.
But, at the Horsesmouth Discovery Lab, we’ve recorded nearly 100 discovery meetings. On average, advisors spoke 70% of the time. The most talkative hit 85%. The most concise still spoke 52% of the meeting time.
Get this: Not a single advisor spoke less than half the conversation.
That’s a significant perception gap. Advisors overestimate their listening skills and underestimate how much they dominate conversations.
Do clients notice? Most importantly, do your clients notice?
You bet they do.
Why do financial advisors talk too much?
Many advisors dominate client conversations—often without realizing it. This isn’t just a bad habit; it’s a mix of psychological tendencies, industry norms and professional insecurities.
The psychology behind overtalking
Following are some of the factors that contribute to overtalking, insights as to why they happen, and ways to fix them.
The ‘expert’ identity trap: Advisors believe proving their expertise means delivering a lot of information. If they’re not talking, they fear they’re not adding value.
- Psychological insight: The illusion of explanatory depth makes people overestimate how much they need to explain.
- The fix: Shift from “expert who speaks” to “guide who listens.” Focus on what matters most.
Fear of silence: Silence makes advisors uncomfortable, so they rush to fill the gap.
- Psychological insight: Alogophobia (fear of silence) stems from discomfort with uncertainty.
- The fix: Learn to tolerate silence. Clients need time to process, i.e. when they’re silent, they’re thinking. And if you want to ask them a good question after some moments of silence, simply ask, “What are you thinking?”
The sales-driven mindset: Many advisors were trained in old-school sales techniques, leading to excessive talking.
- Psychological insight: Confirmation bias causes advisors to push information that supports their recommendations instead of exploring client concerns.
- The fix: Replace persuasion with curiosity. Let clients feel heard.
Performance anxiety and imposter syndrome: Even experienced advisors feel pressure to prove themselves, leading to overexplaining.
- Psychological insight: Imposter syndrome makes advisors overcompensate by talking more.
- The fix: Confidence comes from asking better questions, not having all the answers.
Lack of active-listening skills: Many advisors listen to respond, not to understand.
- Psychological insight: Attentional bias makes advisors filter conversations through their own experiences instead of the client’s.
- The fix: Practice reflective listening—paraphrase what clients say before responding.
The information overload problem: Advisors believe clients need a data dump to make informed decisions.
- Psychological insight: The curse of knowledge makes experts struggle to simplify insights.
- The fix: Less is more. Focus on the right information at the right time.
Roadmap for change: How to talk less and listen more
Many advisors know they need to improve but don’t know how. Change feels daunting, especially if you think the solution is just “working harder.”
The truth? Transformation isn’t about effort. It’s about working differently.
Here’s a structured, actionable roadmap:
Audit your conversations
Before improving, you need to understand what’s happening.
Record and analyze client meetings. Many advisors think they’re great listeners, but recordings often reveal the opposite. (Always get client permission.) Reviewing conversations helps identify gaps in engagement, missed cues and talking dominance.
How do you ask for permission to record the conversation? Here is some language you could use: “May I have your permission to record our conversation for my personal learning? I will be the only one who listens, will maintain strict confidentiality, and will delete the recording once my review is complete.”
Look for patterns. Are you answering questions before clients finish asking? Are you leading instead of allowing discovery? Identifying trends in tone, interruptions and non-verbal responses is crucial.
Self-reflection exercise. After each meeting, write down:
- Three things you did well
- Three areas to improve
Compare this to actual recordings. The gap between perception and reality is where the work begins.
The bottom line: Talk less, listen more
Financial advisors don’t talk too much out of arrogance—it’s habit, fear and training. But today’s clients don’t want an instructor. They want a thought partner.
Key takeaways:
- Talking less makes you more valuable.
- Silence is a tool, not a failure.
- The right question is more powerful than the right answer.
Want to be a better advisor? Stop talking. Start listening.